Business Negotiation August 1, 2025
Overcoming The Phony Acceptance Stall Tactic in Real EstateIn the world of negotiation, few tactics are as emotionally manipulative—and ethically questionable—as the Phony Acceptance Stall Tactic. Most often encountered in real estate transactions, this tactic preys on a buyer’s hope and emotional investment by pretending that an offer is moving forward when in reality, it’s being quietly used as leverage against other prospects. The tactic can also appear in negotiations involving rare or high-demand goods such as antiques, used machinery, or specialty services, where urgency and scarcity create fertile ground for deception.
At KARRASS, we teach that negotiation is not a battle, but a process—a strategic, deliberate series of actions aimed at creating value and reaching mutual agreement. Tactics like this one betray that process. Understanding how the phony acceptance works, and how to respond when you encounter it, is essential for anyone who wants to negotiate ethically, strategically, and with power.
The classic version of this stall tactic unfolds like a carefully orchestrated performance. A buyer sees a house listed at $270,000 and, after some back-and-forth, submits a formal offer of $240,000. The broker accepts the deposit and agrees to present the offer, hinting that it’s likely to be accepted but never making any firm commitment. A day passes. Then another. The broker says the seller is out of town, but reassures the buyer that things are progressing and that only small details—perhaps the fireplace screen or the chandelier—need clarification.
Then comes the stall. Communication slows. New excuses arise daily. The seller can't be reached. The buyer supposedly isn’t responding. The bank needs more time. It’s a fog of indefinite delays. Days stretch into weeks. Finally, the deposit is returned with a polite rejection, and the buyer sees a "SOLD" sign on the property—sold, it seems, to someone else. What likely happened is that the seller used the bona fide offer of $240,000 to coax a higher offer from a second party.
In this scenario, the initial buyer was never truly in the running. Their offer served merely as a bargaining chip—a pawn in someone else’s negotiation. It’s not just frustrating; it’s a breach of good-faith negotiation.
What makes this tactic particularly effective is its manipulation of human psychology. Buyers are led to believe that they are close to a deal, which triggers emotional investment and a reluctance to walk away. The longer they wait, the more they feel they've already committed—not just financially, but mentally. This is known as the sunk cost fallacy: the more time and effort you've spent, the harder it is to let go, even when it’s no longer rational to stay.
The phony acceptance stall tactic also exploits the fear of missing out. With housing markets often moving quickly, buyers are afraid to jeopardize what appears to be a winning position. Sellers and brokers use this fear as a tool to maintain the illusion of momentum while secretly shopping the offer elsewhere.
Dr. Karrass taught that “you have more power than you think.” But that power diminishes when you let uncertainty, hope, and fear cloud your judgment. Recognizing the emotional hooks built into stalling tactics is the first step toward reclaiming your position at the table.
Not every delay is a tactic. Some delays are unavoidable and perfectly reasonable—bank holidays, required inspections, or genuine difficulties in contacting key decision-makers. The challenge lies in distinguishing legitimate delays from bad faith stall tactics designed to string you along without intention to close.
A good-faith negotiator will communicate clearly, explain delays in detail, and provide documentation or updated timelines. A bad-faith actor will offer vague reassurances and move the goalposts daily. They’ll say things like “I’m waiting to hear back,” without naming who, or “We’re still in discussion,” without defining the issue.
According to Dr. Karrass, the best negotiators are prepared. Preparation includes knowing how to detect deception. When responses lack specificity, timelines remain murky, and third parties become convenient scapegoats, you’re likely facing a stall tactic—not a real delay.
One of the most effective ways to combat stalling tactics in negotiations is to prevent them from happening in the first place. That begins before you ever submit your offer.
First, clarify who the key decision-makers are and request direct communication when possible. Don’t let a middleman or broker become a gatekeeper to information. Second, establish expectations up front. When will you receive a response? What channels of communication will be used? Are there any known contingencies that could delay acceptance?
Dr. Karrass believed that good negotiators prepare to manage both their own expectations and the process itself. That includes controlling how their offer is presented and ensuring that it can’t be quietly used as leverage against them. A well-prepared negotiator will also include an expiration clause in the offer, perhaps valid for 48 hours, making it unusable as a long-term bargaining chip.
It’s also wise to ask questions that reveal hidden risk. Is the property still being shown? Are there multiple offers being considered? Has the seller previously accepted an offer that fell through? These answers can reveal whether your offer is being treated seriously—or merely as a placeholder in a larger game.
Negotiation is built on mutual understanding, respect, and the willingness to engage transparently. The phony acceptance stall tactic undermines all of that.
Even if it results in a higher sale price for the seller, the long-term damage is real. Trust erodes, reputations suffer, and the parties are left with a sense of having been manipulated, not negotiated with. The tactic breeds suspicion and damages the perception of everyone involved—especially brokers or intermediaries who knowingly participated in the ruse.
Dr. Karrass taught that negotiation is not about winning at someone else's expense. It is about finding solutions that create value. In this light, the phony acceptance isn’t just unethical—it’s counterproductive. It signals a short-term, win-at-any-cost mentality that rarely leads to lasting business relationships or reputational credibility.
While real estate is the most common arena for this stalling tactic, it is far from the only one. Consider the case of a buyer negotiating for a rare piece of vintage industrial equipment. After making an offer and being told it's "as good as done," the buyer waits through weeks of delays and unanswered emails—only to learn the seller accepted another offer after using the original bid as a negotiating anchor.
In another example, an antique dealer promises to “hold” a rare item for a buyer who has made an offer slightly below asking price. As the buyer arranges transport and payment, the dealer continues to solicit interest from others. A week later, the buyer is told the item sold for full price to someone else.
These aren’t unfortunate misunderstandings—they are intentional stall tactics, designed to give the illusion of negotiation while quietly optimizing outcomes for the seller at the buyer’s expense.
Allowing a phony acceptance to play out without resistance has real consequences. At best, it wastes your time and emotional energy. At worst, it causes you to miss out on other viable opportunities. You may spend days or weeks chasing a deal that was never going to close, all while other properties or offers pass you by.
In business settings, stalled negotiations can result in budget disruptions, missed deadlines, or competitive disadvantage if resources are tied up waiting for resolution. And in personal real estate, they can create deep frustration and financial vulnerability.
Dr. Karrass often emphasized that “you don’t get what you deserve—you get what you negotiate.” That includes negotiating the terms of the process itself. Letting others define the pace, terms, and channels of communication opens the door for manipulation.
The alternative to deception is not weakness—it’s strength with integrity. Ethical negotiators communicate clearly, respond promptly, and set realistic expectations. They don’t rely on stalling tactics or emotional manipulation to gain the upper hand. Instead, they use preparation, persuasion, and principled trading of concessions to get the deal done.
Transparency fosters trust. And trust, in turn, accelerates negotiation. Deals happen faster. Relationships are preserved. Outcomes are more sustainable.
KARRASS teaches that concessions should be traded, not given—and the same is true for time. If one party needs more time to decide, that time should come with mutual understanding and accountability, not vague assurances. Ethical negotiation demands honesty about intentions and respect for the other party’s position.
It’s a deceptive strategy in which a seller gives the false impression that an offer is being seriously considered or accepted, only to stall indefinitely. During the delay, the seller may use the offer as leverage to negotiate better terms with another buyer—often without the original buyer’s knowledge.
Stalled negotiations occur when progress halts—offers aren’t formally rejected, but no real movement takes place either. In some cases, it’s due to genuine delays; in others, it’s a deliberate stalling tactic used to manipulate or pressure one side into compromising.
The best defense is preparation. Clarify decision-makers up front, communicate directly when possible, and include time limits in your offer. Watch for vague answers and repeated delays. If something feels off, trust your instincts and consider walking away before more time is lost.
Yes. While this article focuses on seller tactics, buyers sometimes use delays to push for better terms, secure financing, or stall for competing options. The same principles apply: look for patterns of vague communication, avoid drawn-out responses, and push for clear commitments.
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